Posts Tagged ‘Adebayor to AC Milan


Now you’re just Riberying me.

He's ready for his close-up

Have you heard any good jokes lately? No? How about this one? “Arsenal Set To Make £40m Franck Ribery Bid – Reports.”


Yeah, ok, let’s just assume that Arsenal are going to bid £40m, which, according to Bayern manager Uli Hoeness, is £60m short of his valuation and would get us just a leg. Even if we did bid £40m, BAYERN AREN’T SELLING, so this is a non-story and you have to wonder where it came from.

Wait, what if there is something to this story? If we could get Frank Ribery’s right leg for £40m and sew it onto Eboue, we could make a Frankeneboue! Then the boss could say that Eboue’s “like a new signing” and he could say to everyone that “Arsenal develop players, we do not just buy them.”

And then Wenger would sign Karim Benzema, 3 new goalkeepers, Fat Ronaldo, Felipe Melo AND Lorik Cana, steal E’to’o from City, and get Micah Richards and Brede Hangeland, and possibly bring in Xavi Hernandez and David Villa! All this after selling Frankeneboue for £75m, Adebayor for £93m, Bentdner for £6,999 (like a used car, get it???), Eduardo for a free transfer, and Theo Walgod for £1.2billion.


That settles it, I’m changing the name of the summer transfer period from “interlull” to “interlol.”

InterLOL, wait this is serious

With Adebayor looking closer to AC Milan than ever before, now that Dzeko is off the table and Sevilla is asking £30m for Fabiano, it looks like Wenger might actually end up with the resources to buy Felipe Melo.  Last I heard, Fiorentina want £21m for Melo, which is more than Arsene was willing to pay last year for Alonso, but that Fiorentina are willing to accept Senderos as a makeweight in the deal. So, with the £15m or so Arsenal will get from Adebayor, a Senderos, and maybe even a little cash, we might be able to prise Melo from Fiorentina.

More importantly, this story is starting to look like it has some smoke to it: Melo reportedly asked former Arsenal skipper Gilberto what he thought of Arsenal. As in “hey, I’m thinking about transferring to Arsenal, should I?”


Gio said “yes absolutely” which is a bit of a surprise seeing how he was treated in his last year, but then simultaneously not a surprise since Gio has always been a class act and clearly still loves Arsenal.

What makes me feel better about the whole thing is that Gio also thinks Melo would be good for Arsenal. Each time I’ve watched him he hasn’t looked that impressive but if Gilberto says

He is exactly what they need – a powerful player with quality. If they got him it would be great because he is a player they need at the moment. I’m sure if they got him it would be a good signing. I have told him Arsenal is a great club and I am sure next season they will improve.

then I have no choice but to trust Gilberto. He was a top notch midfielder for Arsenal and he knows exactly what it takes to win trophies in the Premier League. If anyone in this world knows if Felipe Melo is ready to partner Cesc Fabregas at Arsenal and help win a trophy it’s Gilberto Silva.

So, I officially say “bring ’em on.”

Or Cana…

The other player that has been on everyone’s hit list is combative Albanian midfielder, Lorik Cana. His club officially said that he’s for sale and immediately Spuds made a bid. The link above says that Arsene tried to bring him over for a trial when he was younger but were denied a work visa, with him now firmly ensconced in the Albanian team the whole visa thing might work out easier. Though, I’m no expert on the British work visa rules.

Arsenal can offer Champions League football a great salary and a host of world class players, he’d be a fool to chose them over us.

Also, then he’d be a cunt, and we wouldn’t want him anyway!

Usmanov’s Millions

Just when you think it’s safe, Alisher Usmanov reminds us that he has his grubby little fingers all over our club. This time is no different than the last time he cropped up: he wants us all to make a deal with the devil and do a “rights issue” that would “generate” “£100m.”

The details of Usmanov’s proposal are unknown and will be discussed by the board this week but from what I’ve read the basic idea is to issue additional stock and generate fresh investment. Of course, Red and White are saying that this money could be used for transfers (that’s the devil’s bargain) and Gazidis is saying that the board will not do a stock offer and blow the money on transfers (hey, maybe THAT’s where the Ribery story came from!).

Either way, I trust the board on this one. It’s pretty clear that they are openly hostile to Usmanov’s attempts to use Arsenal as his personal piggy bank and will rebuff any proposal that would help him consolidate power. The board is committed to growing Arsenal the old fashioned way and while you might disagree with that because it means you have to forgo the instant gratification of spending big and buying  trophies it’s the only sensible long term plan.

Personally, I plan on passing Arsenal on to my daughter and if Usmanov had his way, I suspect that would be impossible.


Adebayor wins third runner up in AC Milan beauty pageant


Those of you who are using an RSS feed to read my posts should go ahead and point your newsreaders to because on July 1, I’m switching to my own domain. You can go over there now and look at it if you want, some CSS bits are still being manipulated and then I have to export and import all my content (no small feat in a two year old WordPress account) and then I can start whoring myself out to advertisers!


AC Milan VP Adriano Galliani has expressed his interest in Arsenal striker Emmanuel Adebayor.  And by “expressed interest” I mean, put Ade on a pedestal and draped the bronze medal around his neck:

We are only looking for a forward, and our aim is Dzeko. He is a Wolfsburg player, and they have a right to keep him – even though he continues to claim that his desire is to come to Milan. From experience, I know it’s difficult to keep a player whose wish is to leave. If we fail to get Dzeko then Luis Fabiano could be an alternative – as could Adebayor.


I got a chance to watch Fabiano yesterday and last week and in my estimation, Adebayor is actually a better striker. That said, it’s a testament to how far Ade’s stock has fallen that AC Milan put him below Fabiano. Fabiano will easily miss as many shots as Ade but he’ll at least work on the pitch and I haven’t seen him get caught offside yet, so I can see why Galliani puts him above Ade.

Which is sad.

I’m not going to sit here and rip Adebayor because I really like him and I suspect he’s going to be with us next year. I just hope Wenger and Cesc grab him by the nape and shake him out of his vegetable torpor. If he plays like he did two years ago, every Arsenal supporter will get behind him, but if he puts in just one lazy performance, I think that Arsenal fans will be unforgiving.

The ball’s in his court.

Cesc quells the stupidity

I’m not sure how many times I need to talk directly about my commitment to Arsenal as I continue to say the same thing over and over again, but it appears that every time I have spoken to the Spanish media recently, my words have bounced back to England, leaving question marks about my future.

So, for anyone who is unclear or may have misunderstood what my position is, let me make myself absolutely crystal clear. I am wholeheartedly committed to Arsenal and my future lies with this great Club.

It is a fact that we have not won a trophy for four years and yes, I am angry about that, but that anger stems from the deep deep desire I have to win things with Arsenal. I care about this Club and believe in this team. I am proud to captain this team and proud to wear the shirt. It really upsets me when people express my thoughts otherwise. The spirit in this squad is fantastic and we have the ability and mentality to compete on all fronts for silverware. Make no mistake, we are focused and determined to show that we are capable of achieving great things together.

Maybe Cesc should consider being a little more circumspect with the interviews. Either that, or end every sentence with “I am not leaving Arsenal.” The interviews would go like this:

Interviewer: So, Cesc, how are you?
Good, I’m not leaving Arsenal.
Int: Excellent. So, what do you think of Barcelona’s 4-3-3 formation?
Cesc: I enjoy playing and watching attacking football, like both Arsenal and Barcelona play, I’m not leaving Arsenal.
Int: Quite, I think we’ve cleared that up…
Cesc: Still not leaving Arsenal.
Int: uhhh…


Samir Nasri week ends with a bang

It’s been Nasri week over at the dot com owing to the fact that he was voted fourth best player of the season in their poll. To wrap up the week, the powers that be have granted us all a free video in great quality, not that crappy YouTube stuff, of his greatest moment of the season. Walk, don’t run, over to the site and check it out.

Only a few days left to WIN an ARSENAL 89 T-SHIRT

‘It’s Up for Grabs Now’…… And the rest is Arsenal history! Brian Moore’s match commentary as Michael Thomas puts away the goal that clinched the ’89 League Championship in arguably Arsenal’s greatest ever match is featured on Philosophy Football’s anniversary shirt. Plus, a diagram of the winning goal and match details. Available from we have 5 to be won in our competition, to enter simply answer the following simple question:

Liverpool v Arsenal, 26 May 1989, name the two goalscorers.

Send answer, name, address and preferred T-shirt size to Entries close 30 June ’09, no purchase necessary to enter.


Fabregas gives an interview, the Sun is there: everyone panic

It is the official policy of and its affiliates to never, never ever, under any circumstance link to any article published in The Sun. This is because The Sun is a steaming pile of Tottenham. There’s tabloid journalism and then there’s The Sun, the paper which defined tabloid journalism. The “paper” which to this day is an open sore on the anus of society.

So, why, THE FUCK, are people reading their interview with Cesc Fabregas and getting all stoopid?

It’s incredible, really. Just 13 days ago, the Sun printed a direct quote from the man saying that he’s not leaving. Then on the 17th, there’s the official denial from the Captain on the dot com. No door had been opened here folks, Cesc Fabregas is NOT leaving for Real Madrid.

Nor had he said anything different than what he has said all summer: he’s frustrated that Arsenal haven’t won anything, he wants the boss to sign some big name players, he’s not leaving, Phil Brown is a convicted liar, he’s not leaving, he’s frustrated that he hasn’t won anything, but he knows that this team has a lot of potential and is ready to break out into something really big.

So, can we just stop? I know that it’s a certain personality that becomes an Arsenal supporter, but for once, just put down all of your nueroses, all of your “I KNOW WHAT’S BEST/WHAT’S REALLY HAPPENING” bullshiat and just look at the story rationally. And you can start by reading the translated quotes here.

Fabregas is not going anywhere.

Full stop.


I love it when I’m right.

Well, I was partially right. As someone pointed out yesterday, Cesc will probably play in Sunday’s consolation match, which means that he doesn’t get to go home and get started on his vacation and be all rested before training camp kicks off. Oh well.

I taped the match in high def (thanks to ESPN) and it looked amazing. I can’t wait for ESPN to broadcast EPL games in HD next year.*

Also, is it my imagination or did the USA play an 8-0-2? I mean, they looked downright Bolton-esque in that win didn’t they? That’s a lot of fun to watch, isn’t it?

Given their tactical deficiencies and utter lack of talent I doubt they will be able to pull off another win against Brazil on Sunday (assuming Brazil can beat South Africa today!) but who knows . After all, international football is probably the most suceptible to the “smash and grab” tactics of teams like Bolton, owing to the facts that the international squads practice together so rarely and that tournaments are one and done. I mean, if they played a best of 5 or even a best of 3 Spain would win, I have no doubt.

Spain would win because Cesc looked great out there; running his ass off, putting in long balls, short balls, chips, easy passes, inch perfect passes, good tackles, man marking, basically everything he wasn’t doing well for Arsenal last year. And if he had a world class striker on the pitch, like Eduardo, Spain would have won 2 or even 3 to nil. Instead he had the world’s most overrated goal poacher on the pitch, who basically made a hash of every Fabregas pass. A guy who requires 30 some shots to get 3 goals! A guy who puts more shots wide than on target! A man… hey… like Adebayor! Let’s break the bank and bring him in!

When you have a second you should go to FIFA’s web site and look at their comical “Castrol Index” this is the index that gives Felipe Melo a ranking of 8th in the tournament and, despite the fact that Cesc has two assists and a goal, gives Fabregas a ranking of 52nd. All you need to know is that they ranked David Villa over Fernando Torres, but hey, whatever.


Milan is supposedly interested in Arsenal’s David Villa. Meh…

*while this is speculation it at least has a kernel of truth, which the ‘Cesc thinks Arsenal sucks and is leaving for Real Madrid’ stories do not.


My best friend’s sister’s boyfriend’s brother’s girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who’s going with the girl who talked to Vermaelen about signing for Arsenal last night. I guess it’s pretty serious.

7amkickoff Exclusive!

I can exclusively report that Arsenal have confirmed a friendly against Hannover Fist on July 29th. This means that we are less than two months away from the return of real football!

7amkickoff two-xclusive!

7am kickoff has heard from a reliable source that Zlatan Ibrahimovich is a cunt! My source says that Zlatan said the following about Arsenal:

Just look at Arsenal. They don’t buy the best players, which is sad, very sad for their supporters, they pay a lot of money for a season ticket just to see a junior team. That can’t be fun.

Did Inter even play in Europe last year? Oh wait, they did, and they were knocked out of the competition in the first round, after barely squeaking into the knockout competition, coming in second in their group to Panathinaikos — a Greek team, who don’t even have a league, they play against goats with wine bottles as the ball.

Oh, and Zlatan, we don’t buy the best players, we get them the old fashioned way, we make them.

Speaking of Transfers

There’s no actual transfer news, of course, but rumor has it that Arsenal are on the verge of signing Vermaelen, which you all already know.

Meanwhile, the World’s Least Reliable Newspaper is reporting that AC Milan is wanting to sign one of our children, Adebayor, for £15m. Coincidentally, that offer is exactly £12 for every offside that Adebayor was guilty of this season.

Mean-meanwhile, Arsenal are reportedly closing in on the signature of soon to be rumored (I’m starting it right now) Arsenal player, Lucas Neill. This happened because a) I just made it up and b) he rejected a new offer from West Ham. Arsenal like Neill because he is reportedly 7 months younger than Silvestre, and as Zlatan has pointed out Arsenal are nothing if not a youth team.

On the other hand, it is possible that Arsenal are not in for Lucas Neill and are instead interested in Gary Cahill. Supposedly, this is because Brede Hangeland is refusing our £8m bid. The only problem with this story is that Bolton are asking £20m, which is completely retarded, and I mean that in a very negative way.

Wait, new information has just come in and it seems that Gary Cahill once played for Villa and put in a stunning bicycle kick which relegated one of my least favorite teams in the world, Birmingham City.

£20m is a steal.

Last but not least, stop me if you’ve heard this one…

The USA National team went down 3-1 to Costa Rica in World Cup qualifying. To some people this isn’t funny.


Ade to Milan, Xabi to Arsenal, Barry to Arsenal, and Cesc to Real/Barca. No, this is not a repeat of summer 2008

It’s going to be a scorcher here, 80 some degrees (Fahrenheit) and I think I might get the motorcycle out. That seems like a nice way to kick off the Transfer season.

A couple of things before we get into the “news.” First off, you should look for me to migrate the site to my actual dot com site this summer. This might mean a week off from blogging. Maybe less, we’ll see.

Second, I appreciate everyone who voted yesterday. The turnout was pretty good and the winner, with 89 votes, is Eduardo’s cheeky side footer against Burnley.

I’ve said it before, but a 100% healthy Eduardo is key to success next season because as that video shows he’s just a top, top class striker. If you think back to the end of the 05/06 season, it was pretty clear that Arsenal’s new style of play needed a poacher. It took him two years and the loss of Titi, but finally Wenger went out and got one. And all Dudu did in his first year was score 8 goals in 19 starts. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that if he gets a good run next year 20 goals is achievable.

Fingers crossed!

You know how I know this is meaningless?

Evidently, Arsenal came in third place in the “Fair Play League.” I’ve followed this particular stat for a few years and always thought this meant something, I mean, add up reds and yellows and viola you get a pretty fair representation of a team’s play, right? Well, it turns out that the “Barclays Fair Play League” has all kinds of stupid, subjective, crapola like “positive play” and “respect for referees.”

And there’s Chelsea, above Arsenal.


Yeah, right, I watched quite a few Chelsea matches this season and there is no way that team should be above Arsenal in “fair play.”

Rehashing 2008’s transfer stories.

As a subscriber to, I’m used to seeing stupid news stories. I’m even used to seeing repeats, it’s one thing you can guarantee from the press; they will repeat stories until people catch on to what they are doing. But I’m not used to having 4 repeats of 4 Arsenal transfer stories pop up on the same day; Ade to Milan, Cesc has targeted Alonso, Barry is a target for Arsenal, and then there’s the ubiquitous “Cesc to Spain” story. Strange indeed.

Oh well, since this Alonso/Barry story is a repeat of last year, I went back and looked at what I said about this last year — if they can repeat, why can’t I? Enjoy.

I’ll bet if Silvestre stays healthy he will be seen by Gooners as yet another master stroke by the boss (I just HAD to include this little gem, who is the dumbass who writes this blog? DOES HE EVEN WATCH SOCCER???)

Meanwhile, the boss was more circumspect with his statements about Barry/Alosno.  I’m lumping both players together here because, they are both 27, both play midfield, both are cup tied, both are Arsenal targets and both players fit Arsene’s quotes.  Thus, I consider Arsene to be chasing both players and whichever one we get, I think Arsenal fans will be happy.  I’d prefer Alonso because I think he’s a technically superior player, he’s Spanish, and he would fit right into the Arsenal midfield.  On the other hand, Barry would bring steel and English-ness to the team, and let’s not let the importance of having Englishmen on the team fall to the way side.  Rumor has it Arsenal have already negotiated a contract with Alonso but Liverpool is refusing to lower their value of the player at £18m, even though, as Arsene points out he’s cup tied.  Villa, similarly, are stuck with their £18m valuation since they have already turned down a lesser bid from Liverpool.  I suppose they could offer Arsenal the player for less, but wouldn’t that allow Liverpool the same chance to swoop for the player that Arsenal just did for Silvestre?

More importantly for me is I don’t get the sense that Barry wants to play for Arsenal.  No.  He wants to play for Liverpool, you know, to “fulfill his dream.”  I think Barry is a smokescreen.  Arsenal are in for Alonso and Alonso only.  We’ll just have to wait and see.  Just the other day I was preparing you all for a summer with no more signings and now here I am hopeful that the team will sign the one player I wanted all summer — starry eyed optimist that I am.

I really wish that the cocksandwich who wrote that crap above at least watched some soccer.

That’s it for today, I’ve got to get the bike up and running and get to work. See you later!


He’s baaaaaack!

I love it.

The Adebayor story is back on the front page of every paper and we now have more “facts” at our disposal.

Fact 1: according to AC Milan vice president Adriano Galliani, Arsenal are telling rival clubs that Adebayor is only for sale at the staggering price of €45 million (£35.6 million).  Galliani then whines about how Milan cannot afford those prices.  Boo hoo.  He then says “while I once said that I ‘only have eyes for Adebayor’ I am now kind of staring at Ronaldinho.  It’s hard not to stare because he’s so fat.  What happened to him over the last few months?  Did he discover the chip butty? Anyway, that’s all us poor Italians can afford, fat, washed up, broken players, I really wish FIFA and UEFA would do something about this problem.”

Fact 2: Arsenal have offered Adebayor a new contract worth a reported £45,000/wk.  He isn’t signing it right now, preferring to wait and see what happens with the whole transfer/wage increase saga.

Fact 3: Arsenal rejected a £25m offer from Barcelona.  Barcelona are now preparing a £30m-ish bid for the Arsenal striker, supposedly.

Fact 4: I had it wrong, Vincenzo Morabito Super Agent is NOT Adebayor’s agent, Ade’s agent is Stephane Courbis and he is seriously nuts:

It is vital that Arsenal show their motivation (£££) to keep him.  There has been a love story between Adebayor and Arsenal and his relationship with Arsène Wenger is based on trust and respect. Emmanuel is a man of heart, not of money. (???) He is not greedy. He is a kid from the street, has sensibilities and is humble. (???) If this was a money problem, then he would have asked to leave (which he did), I know that Arsenal’s political position is that they don’t pay high salaries. Whatever they decide, the decision will be taken with respect. (???)

That’s simple then, since it’s not about the money, since Adebayor is in love with Arsenal, and since Adebayor is humble, he’ll just go ahead and sign Arsenal’s £45,000/wk offer that’s on the table.  But if he doesn’t I’m sure his humility, love, and respect for Arsenal will force him to just go ahead and play out the rest of his contract without any complaints about salary or transfers to other “dream” clubs like Barcelona.

Fact 5: Like I said, Barca are reportedly putting together a £30m-ish offer for Adebayor which means that both Arsenal and other teams (like Barcelona) rate the player very highly.  I don’t know how the Hater-Ade’s (get it? HAR!) feel about the fact that professional football managers at the very highest level (like Arsenal and Barcelona) rate Adebayor so highly.  Likely they either ignore it or think “Barcelona is crazy!”

Those are the facts as we know them right now: 7am PDT, July 2nd 2008.  Those facts may change without notice in which case I will write about them.

If Arsenal receive 1 pence over £30m, I say they should do the deal.  At that price Arsenal could buy 4-5 people you’ve never heard of, raise their price, and sell them on for a huge profit.

Speaking of dudes you’ve never heard of: Amaury Bischoff has been released by Werder Bremen and this supposedly means that he’ll be coming to Arsenal.  What do we know about Amaury?  He’s “highly rated,” he’s Portuguese, he played for the Portuguese U21 team, he’s been injured for most of his career at Bremen, and he claims he’s coming to Arsenal to play in the reserves.

In squad news, Eduardo’s early comeback is garnering some press with pretty much everyone saying that he will be able to participate in training camp and may even be ready for the start of the season.  I sincerely hope the young man recovers fully from Martin Taylor’s vicious attack.

Clichy week is in full swing and Arsenal have released a statistical look back at the Left Back’s amazing season.  You all know how much I love statistics, so check it out.

Also on the Dot Com is a podcast of the Gunner’s Greatest Players no. 50 through 21.  I like listening to the Arsenal old timers talk about their fellow professionals even if the official Arsenal podcasts are often of shockingly poor quality.  Hey!  They should call me, I’d love to produce those segments.  I couldn’t possibly do any worse.

Maybe I should call SATAN Kroenke, my fellow American, and ask for a spot on the Dot Com.  He’ll have more pull with the club as soon as he’s on the board.  Oh yeah, Stan’s not looking to takeover Arsenal, so go ahead and relax English fans.  My favorite part of that article is the 720 degree turn around that Peter Hill-Wood has taken on Kroenke.  He’s gone from “we don’t need his sort” to:

He is quiet, not ostentatious He could be a very good ally and colleague. There is some logic in him getting close to us. He is a sensible man who is a sportsperson and has got some expertise in his business and that has helped him to develop a fanbase there [in Colorado]

And finally, Joey Barton is reportedly being courted by Bolton.  I was thinking about Joey Barton and his many, many, many transgressions and I wondered “how long would Arsenal keep a man like that on their payroll?  Hell, how long would any of the top 4 clubs keep him on their payroll?”  Then I realized, that’s what separates top clubs from bottom feeders like Bolton: common sense.

I’ll leave it on that note, see you all tomorrow.


Ok, that’s enough


Ok, there, you meathead, you had your, ehh, fun there: you’re staying, you’re going, you’re staying, you’re going.  You’re as mixed up as one of them there Gay Republicans.  Chose one there, Adebayor, Arsenal or Milan.  You can’t be both.

(Ed’s note: Today’s guest columnist is the notoriously “politically incorrect” character Archie Bunker from the famous 70s television show “All In the Family.”  7am kickoff in no way condones the idea that gay people can’t be republicans or vice-versa.  Also, 7am kickoff is tired of reporting on Adebayor, because the situation has become, well… retarded. It’s time to move on, until and when something actually happens.  Like an actual signing, or an actual trade, or SOMETHING ANYTHING GOD PLEASE…)

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